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高人一等就高尚?评亚裔的追求名利和优越感思潮

Does nobility lie in being superior?
来源: 大中报 南茜(Nancy Jin)
拥有权力、财富和名望可以提升个人满足感,让他人仰慕,它让你倍感出人头地,并享受到这种名利和优越感带来的喜悦。寻求成功的社会地位和优越感或许是人类的与生具有的欲望,但在中国不断增长的物欲浪潮冲击下,这种欲望似乎已经变成一种根深蒂固的华裔心态。

Attaining power, rich and prestigious can boost your personal ego and impress people. It makes you feel superior and gives you the joy of being special. Seeking successful social status and self-supremacy over others could be a natural human desire, but it seems to have become a deep-rooted Chinese mentality as China grapples with growing materialism.

 
一位华裔博客主曾写道,中国人的社会地位在很大程度上取决于他们开什么车,或是住宅有多豪华。除了豪车和豪宅,子女的成功也会让许多中国人油然而生自豪感和自我优越感。大部分亚裔家长都希望子女出类拔萃,期望他们拿到顶尖大学的学位,然后从事极具社会声望且收入颇丰的高薪职业。

A Chinese blogger writes that Chinese people’s social class largely depends on what luxury cars they drive or how many mansions they own.  Besides expensive cars and luxury homes, the children’s success can also bring pride and the feeling of self-supremacy for many Chinese people. Most Asian parents expect their children to be the “best”, hoping them to get a degree of a top-notched university and then a lucrative job that comes with significant social prominence and financial glory. 

 
但是,超人一等就高尚吗? 事实上,这种追求优越感欲望可能并不现实,把你带入虚幻境地。而且如果因此走上极端,不仅可能对自身不利,甚至有可能导致无可挽回的伤害。那些令人垂涎的职业可能会带来巨大压力,很快就让人不堪重负。同时它们还会严重损害人体健康,导致身体疾病、抑郁乃至严重心理问题。有些人因此沦为吸毒者,还有些人则被工作压力压垮 , 甚至付出生命代价。

But does nobility lie in being superior? In fact, this superiority sentiment could be delusional, and if taken to the extreme, it could be detrimental, causing irrevocable damages.   The prestigious jobs could become highly stressful and burn you out quickly. They can take a toll on your health – from physical illness to depression to serious mental problems. While some become drug users, others have succumbed to the job stress and even lost their lives.

 
在今年年初,高盛集团旧金山支行一名年仅24岁的新入职员工在从事压力巨大的投行分析师工作不久后便猝死,而投行分析师的工作正是许多加拿大华裔梦想的职业。这份工作可让一个24岁的年轻人拿到$15万元年薪,并有可能在将来拥有亿万财富和私人飞机。

Early this year, a 24 year old first-year associate at the Goldman Sachs office in San Francisco died after taking the highly stressful job as an investment banking analyst—the most desiring job among Asian Canadians. The job can pay a grand total of $150,000 for a 24 year old – who has a potential to earn a hundred million and private jet down the road.
 
 
据媒体报道称,美国出生的印度裔青年Sarvshreshth Gupta在从宾夕法尼亚大学毕业后便进入高盛从事投行分析师工作,但不久便死于工作压力。在去世前Gupta曾一直连续超负荷工作,严重睡眠不足。在今年2月的一个凌晨,精疲力竭的Gupta曾告诉父亲他并不适合这份工作,他感觉自己已经濒临崩溃,但他仍决定留任。Gupta是否也因贪求名誉,而成了亚裔名利思潮的牺牲品?

According to media report, Sarvshreshth Gupta, an Indian born American who took an investment banking job after graduating from University of Pennsylvania, died of job stress. He had overworked for prolonged hours and was sleep-deprived. During the wee hours of a Feb. morning, extremely exhausted Gupta told his father that he wasn’t suitable for the job, feeling he was on the edge of collapse. However, he chose to hang on to it. Was he obsessed with this superiority sentiment and under the strong influence of Asian supremacy culture?

 
原本打算回家休息几个小时的Gupta最终死于其住宅前的停车场内。

Gupta, who had planned to take a few hours of break at home, died at the parking lot in front of his building.

 
这种追求名利和超人的优越感还会导致人们感到不安全、自卑和失望。许多因追求出国优越感而决定出国的华裔移民来加后很快就会心生不满。当他们看到身在中国的同侪登上更高职位或是成为业内专家时,他们立刻就会丧失自尊,自卑感丛生,甚至会觉得自己一钱不值。

This superiority obsession can also lead to feelings of insecurity, inferiority and disappointment. Many Asian immigrants who decided to immigrate to North America simply for the wrong reason, such as seeking self-supremacy -- would quickly feel discontent. Seeing their peers in China taking more important positions or becoming experts in their professions, they would quickly lose their self-esteem, feel inferior and even believe their life becomes worthless. 

 
除此之外,华裔的这种名利思潮还有很多其他不利因素。追求名利者会轻易地瞧不起他人,对在社会地层挣扎的人士滋生鄙夷。 我17岁的女儿自愿加入了学校组织的消除饥饿计划为贫困人士提供免费早餐。她有一天回家告诉我说她很钦佩那里遇见的一名流浪汉。

This Asian supremacy culture has other downsides. It can also lead to the entitlement of judging others – especially the marginal group. I was deeply touched when my 17-year-old daughter, who volunteered at her school’s Feed the Hungry Program, came home one day telling me how she admired a homeless guy.

 
女儿含着眼泪告诉我,这个流浪汉让她钦佩和尊重,因为他忍受着旁人难以想象的癌症病痛折磨,数十年来在许多人蔑视贬低的眼光中坚强地活了下来。

She told me, with tears in her eyes, that she admires and respects him, because he has endured the torment of cancer that others can hardly imagine and survived decades-long disparagements and belittlements by others.   

 
女儿的话让我羞愧难当,因为我也和其他数百万亚裔一样看不起流浪汉。在只钦羡亿万富翁和有权有势之人的浪潮冲击下,那些不名一文的小人物都是蠢猪、 人渣和彻底的失败者。

I was embarrassed because I was one of the millions of Asian people who believe that homeless is disgraceful. In a culture that only admires billionaires, the powerful and authority figures, those who do not have a penny to their name are the boar hogs, scums and sore losers.  

 
在Gupta的父亲悼念亡子时,我那些大学同学们正在微信群中热烈地讨论着子女们事业前景:

As Gupta’s father was mourning his dead son, my WeChat group members – mostly my former college classmates started a wave of discussion over their sons and daughters’ career goals:

 
一位自豪的母亲发帖称:“我儿子在就读于宾夕法尼亚大学,将来会找一份投行工作。”她的发言随即吸引了很多跟帖者。

“My son got into University of Pennsylvania and will look for a job as an investment banker,” a proud mother posted on WeChat group. Her post engaged many others who quickly followed suit. 

 
“那是一份最为理想的工作,我希望我女儿也能进入这一行!我希望她将来能成为一名华尔街精英 !”

“That was the ideal job that I hope my daughter will take! It is my ultimate goal that she will be a Wall Street professional!”

 
“我儿子毕业于纽约大学,但他也很可能进高盛工作!”

“My son graduated from New York University, but he is very likely to get into Goldman Sachs!”

 
看到这么多的张贴不断涌入我的手机账户,我选择沉默。我那位就读于毅伟商学院的儿子在几个月前已经明言不会寻求华尔街的工作,因为他认为自己不适合这种工作。

But I kept silent, as I watched heated reactions from the proud mothers flocking into my inbox. I had nothing to offer.  A few months ago, my son – an Ivey business school student, declared that he won’t pursue a Wall Street job, because he doesn’t believe that the job suits him.

 
我尊重儿子的决定,我认为他的个人幸福和心理健康远比我膨胀的自尊重要。我可不想重蹈Gupta的父亲的覆辙。我也不会因此感到自己是失败者而在同学面前感到羞愧或丢脸,至少我不会像当听到女儿充满激情地对我说华裔贬低流浪有多可耻时那么羞愧难当。

I respect my son’s decision. I believe that my son’s happiness and mental health far outweighs my swelling ego, and I don’t want be in Gupta’s father’s shoes one day.  And neither do I believe that I am loser, feeling embarrassed or disgraceful in front of my classmates– at least not to the same extent when my daughter passionately told me how wrong it was that Chinese people judge the homeless. 

 

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